As I hit 22 weeks, I want to share some insights of my personal experience with pregnancy so far:
- I have always had big boobs but I didn’t know that they were going to get this huge! Now, they are about double or triple that size. Nothing fits well and they pop out every which way! I don’t think they’re as big as Jessica Simpson or Kim Kardashian though. Thank goodness for that.
- My body is truly not my own. It doesn’t do the same things that it once did. I have to keep reminding myself that when I get frustrated at the gym when I’m unable to finish a workout or when I think I wasted my day by taking 3 solid naps. My body is harboring my little one and I’m his best defense and offense at the moment. 🙂
- First time mothers, moms-many-times-over, grandmothers, co-workers, friends and strangers will share their 2 cents with you even if you don’t ask for it. Any advice and helpful tips are a blessing but unfortunately, insensitive remarks come with the territory. ‘OMG! You gained so much weight! You should start exercising! You shouldn’t be THAT big! Thank goodness you’re pregnant and not just fat!’ They are very hurtful and might I add rude.
I don’t know if it’s because I’m Asian but I guess we’re known to be more diminutive in size and stature? I was never that girl who wore size 00 clothing so don’t expect me to be a petite little thing with only a burgeoning belly. Sadly, family has been more insensitive to me than anyone else. They don’t think before they speak.
- Hormones are running rampant and I had no idea that I was going to be this up and down in mood. I’m still coming to terms of just being okay. I don’t have to feel fantastic all the time and I shouldn’t try to pretend that I’m doing great 24/7 either.
- All pregnant women deal with a plethora of symptoms or none at all. I dealt with the usual nausea, headaches, round ligament stretching/cramping, thicker hair, fatigue and the linea nigra formation. However, I was surprised with the little pimples that formed on my chest/back and the little sprouts of hair that formed on my chin! I thought, “Ahhhh! I’m turning into a beast!” They’ve lessened in severity since I hit the 2nd trimester but dang, ya’ll. What the dillyo?!
- I’m not scared of labor or delivery. I believe i have a very high tolerance to pain but I guess we’re going to find out in due time, aren’t we? 😛 However, reality sunk in a few weeks ago when it FINALLY dawned on me that I’m going to bring another person into this world. Not just a baby but another person. Now I understand my mom. I asked her a few years ago why she waited 4 years to have me and she said she just wasn’t ready emotionally/financially to bring another human life into the world. My mom is a smart lady. All these thoughts raced through my head and still do: ‘Will I be at least half the super mom my mom is? What did I get myself into? I’m not ready to be a mom! How am I going to raise him? Will he love me? Am I ready?’
It’s true though as they say: no one is truly ready to be a parent. I feel like I’m finally becoming a grown-up. I’m going to be responsible for someone else besides myself. I’m going to be someone my little one will look up to. I’m scared but I’m also surprised at how much in love I am with my son already. I believe this is how much my parents and God must love me. 🙂